Dear Kim, I really need Your advice, as I’m facing some issues and I dont know how to handle them. today, I had a nice client, I know her, but not well. The problem was, that she talked a lot about herself and I didn’t want to interrupt her. She likes to talk. We really needed 20 minutes more but she had to leave to get the train. Actually I felt that it was not enough time for her colours and she was so weird at the end. Perhaps she wasn’t too happy because I didn’t see an AHA moment on her face. I always advertise that I give practical tips for moms. I feel now I didn’t have time to do that so I offered her a 30 min consultation at my home in case she had missed something. But she has not answered. What should I have done? Is this my fault? Should I offer her even more?
I had another lady a couple of months ago. We sell bracelets with a client’s best colours but she wanted a necklace instead. So we created it for her. She liked it, but not on herself. I saw this in her face. Again, I felt I needed to compensate somehow. I wrote to her but she, too, didn’t answer.
What can I do when somebody doesn’t answer? Why have I totally lost my confidence? After any consultation which I feel was not so perfect, I start going through pictures and articles about colour types, assuming that maybe I was wrong in my diagnosis… I know you say this is not about me, but…
Thank you for your reply! PS. When I lose my confidence, most of the time I just watch your videos, and I feel much better :). Esmeralda
Stop worrying right now!
This is not about you at all. This is entirely about the client.
You are responsible TO the client. You are not responsible FOR her.
This means your responsibility is to provide the information, advice, etc. that the client is paying you for.
What she chooses to do with it is entirely up to her.
“You can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make it drink.”
It is not your responsibility to produce an ah-ha moment in your client that you can visibly see.
It seems that is how you are judging whether the consultation has been successful or not.
This is total nonsense.
Do you ask them to complete a feedback form so that you can find out what they think so far?
By the way, auditory learners will prefer to write how they feel, rather than show it. Have you considered that?
You cannot judge the final results only by the response you can see.
Stop putting yourself under that level of pressure.
Take into account your client’s Colour Personality type:
- Yellow personalities are the most likely to show how they feel
- Greens will ask more and more questions and you will have to throw them out (in a kind way, of course)
- But the two more introverted types will be far more difficult to read
- You won’t get many Reds anyway (and you should thank the heavens for that). They will probably be the most challenging because they take a lot to be convinced
- Blues will thank you and show no emotion at all
- Reds and Blues need time to process what you’ve told them. So let them go, and follow up a few days later to check if they have any questions
How to determine whether a consultation has been successful or not
You also have to look at how YOU performed in the consultation, not solely at your client’s response (or lack of it).
1. Did you deliver what your client wanted?
- If you didn’t ask her what SHE wanted at the beginning of the consultation, how will you ever be able to answer this question?
2. Did you give your full attention to the client?
- Did you allow her the me-time she probably came for?
- Or did you put your own requirements first, perhaps by interrupting purely to make sure you delivered your content?
- You allowed today’s client to rattle on
- i. If you have already asked her what she wants, and you have told her what you can actually deliver in the time you have together, and she still chooses to use the time to talk about herself, then that is her choice. After all, it’s her money, time and energy!
- ii. Have you considered that this might be the first time for ages that anyone has actively listened to her?
- iii. Maybe ‘she was so weird at the end’ because she’s had a major breakthrough in her thinking, which is a direct result of you allowing her to talk about herself and get it all out of her head?
- iv. Making any assumption is daft but the one you quote, “Maybe she was not so satisfied, I didn’t see this AHA moment in her face…” is total rubbish. You have absolutely no evidence for this
3. You need a plan for those occasions you feel that you have not been able to provide the content you know the client would benefit from
First of all, if you can definitely answer ‘yes’ to 1. and 2. above, then you are under no obligation to offer to ‘a 30 min consultation at my home in case she missed something’ or anything else like that, although you are a total sweetheart for wanting to do that
For future clients, here’s what I would recommend
- You contact them with something like, “I’m just following up on your (whatever) consultation last week. After you’d gone, I realised there was something I’d not had a chance to tell you.”
- Then give her one great tip that you didn’t have time to tell her at the consultation. This could simply be a reminder of her best colours, or a lipstick suggestion, or something you noticed, e.g. ‘You’re such a lady so I would recommend that you keep the darker colours (examples) away from your face or team them with your best lightest neutral (example) or with those fabulous gold earrings you were wearing…’ Whatever it is, it must be positive and help to build her confidence.
- Then continue with something like, “I also wanted to give you an opportunity to ask me any questions as I know it can take a few days for the information about your colours (or whatever) to sink in. Feel free to ask me any questions by email. I’m here to help.”
Every consultant will experience a lack of confidence at some point
I totally get how you feel, Esmeralda. I’ve been there myself, on more than one occasion.
I have had clients who have been over the moon at the consultation, telling me they have loved every minute, hugging me, saying that their life has changed, etc. and, yet, when they’ve gone, it’s often been me that’s felt that the consultation was less than successful.
I have then allowed myself to wallow in my own inadequacies, working my brain through all this sort of rubbish – I didn’t listen, I didn’t follow through with something that the client told me, or I didn’t have the guts to say (whatever)…
It’s a total waste of time and energy because you cannot judge a consultation simply from your point of view.
There are two people in the room, both contributing verbally, visually, intellectually, emotionally, and at a subconscious vibrational level.
There’s a heck of a lot more going on than what you THINK you can see in a client’s face or body language.
And when someone doesn’t answer you or responds in what APPEARS to be a negative way…
Stop assuming what’s going on in your client’s head, because you have absolutely no idea and you’re just making it up. In fact, as my mentor used to tell me, “Kim, you’re just lying to yourself.”
When you feel tempted to ‘compensate somehow’, slap yourself round the back of the head and remind yourself, “I am a business woman. This isn’t personal. I’m not here to make friends. This is strictly business.”
And then do what a business owner would do.
Great customer service could certainly include offering a free call, or a discount on the next service.
But only offer that if you truly believe that it is YOU that is solely responsible for the client’s response (or lack of it).
This is not about your abilities with regard to colour and you know it!
This is about learning to understand how human beings actually work
You’re hoping that every single client will be singing and dancing as she leaves you.
That is simply not going to happen.
We’re all different. Allow people to be who they really are.
That’s what you did with the first lady; you let her blether on and it sounds to me as though that is just what she needed at that particular moment in her life.
Just do the very best you can, and continue to improve and refine what and how you deliver by learning from every single person you meet.
There’s nothing wrong with you. And there never was!
I wish you everything I wish for myself,